By now, you’ve probably heard about that unfortunate CEO who got caught on the big screen at a Coldplay concert getting very cosy with someone who wasn’t his spouse. Embarrassing? Absolutely. But honestly, that’s tame compared to some of the workplace antics we’ve seen in the wild.
Here’s what we’ve seen in real life (no names, obviously), and what employers should be doing to keep things professional when Cupid strikes in the office.
Tales from the HR Crypt
Let’s start with the gossip:
- The Webcam Surprise: A manager, worried someone was snooping through his desk, set up a webcam. He didn’t catch a thief… but did catch his two assistants using the office for very personal after-hours activities. Caught on camera. On company property. Yep.
- Car Park Confessions: One clubhouse manager locked up at 2am — and then spent two more hours in the car park with a golf club member. All caught on CCTV. Monday’s security review was eventful.
- Simulator Shenanigans: A golf pro gave one lady member an unusual number of “private lessons” in the simulator. They’d both emerge sweaty, flustered and looking like they’d just played five rounds. Golf was not the only thing being practised.
- Pot, Meet Kettle: A business owner asked for a strict relationships-at-work policy after noticing two salespeople getting flirty. Sensible, right? Until he started an affair with one of his staff. Policies for the staff, but not for the boss, apparently.
Why It Matters
People spend a lot of time at work. Relationships form — it’s normal. Surveys suggest that over half of employees have dated a colleague at some point. Most of the time, it’s harmless. But as the examples above show, when things go wrong, they go spectacularly wrong.
Here’s what can trip you up:
- Sex on site: No, really — it happens. And it’s not just inappropriate, it’s a disciplinary issue. Make it clear: no intimate activity on the premises. You have CCTV, and people will talk.
- Breakups = Drama: Once love turns to loathing, ex-couples can bring a toxic atmosphere to the workplace. Refusing to work together, constant sniping, dragging teammates into it — we’ve seen it all. Sometimes you lose a good employee simply because they can’t bear to be in the same room as their ex.
- Power imbalances: The biggest red flag. If a director starts dating someone junior — say, the receptionist — there’s a serious risk of harassment claims, even if the relationship starts out “consensual”. It only takes one misstep post-breakup to end up in tribunal territory.
What Employers Should Be Doing
So, what does best practice look like? Here’s a quick and practical rundown (with none of the fun taken out):
- Don’t Ban Relationships
An outright “no dating” policy isn’t realistic — it’s better to focus on behaviour, not the relationship itself.
- Set Boundaries
You can absolutely say no to:
- Sexual activity on site.
- Public displays of affection during working hours.
- Behaviour that disrupts the workplace or makes others uncomfortable.
Being in a relationship isn’t the issue — acting unprofessionally is.
- Be Proactive About Power Imbalances
Where one person has authority over the other, take action. That might mean:
- Moving one party to a different team.
- Adjusting reporting lines.
- Making sure decisions about pay, promotion or performance are impartial.
If you do nothing and a complaint arises, the company can be held liable — not just the individual manager.
- Train Your Staff
All staff — including senior leaders — need proper training on:
- What counts as sexual harassment.
- How power dynamics can create pressure, even unintentionally.
- How to behave professionally at work, even when romance is involved.
As of October 2024, employers now have a legal duty to prevent sexual harassment — meaning you can’t just wait for a complaint. Training is part of that duty, and failing to do it could cost you extra compensation if a claim is upheld.
- Handle Breakups Sensitively
If a workplace relationship ends and things turn sour:
- Speak to both parties separately.
- Set expectations around professional conduct.
- Consider mediation or, if necessary, moving one party.
But always stay neutral — don’t take sides.
Final Thought
Workplace romance isn’t going anywhere. People meet, they flirt, they fall in love — and sometimes, it ends in drama. You don’t need to become the “love police”, but you do need to be clear about boundaries, fair about process, and firm about consequences.
A little policy and planning now could save you a whole lot of trouble later — and stop your business from becoming the next story in an HR gossip blog (or worse, an employment tribunal ruling)!
